The Taming of the Text, Tweet, and Post by Jennifer Strecker

The Taming of the Text, Tweet and Post

I’m sure when James wrote about the taming of the tongue he did not anticipate the social media blowout that would be Text, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and now Snapchat. As I understand it, My Space is becoming obsolete. I guess to sum it up, my husband has often said to me, “Jen, it’s not what you say; it’s HOW you say it.”

My 19 year-old daughter, Sydney has become extremely adept at determining the mood, or as I call it, the weather forecast (fair to partly cloudy), created by a text, post, tweet, or chat.

She has had 2 teenage relationships in her short life. The first was in 11^th grade. I remember her getting upset when she got a text from her then boyfriend which read as follows: “OK Sydney.”  When she showed me the text I reasoned that it was an adequate response to her previous text of, “Do whatever you want. That’s fine with me.” It sounded copacetic enough.  “No mom, you don’t understand. He’s REALLY mad!”

I didn’t understand. I still have difficulty understanding. However, I have garnered a slight edge for those of you who will need this ominous skill to assist your young daughters (and sons) in the future.

Response in text ( from the boyfriend)	Meaning in Context (to the receiver-girlfriend)	Meaning out of Context (To the Parent)
Heyy!	He likes me He’s happy with me	That person can’t spell Hello!
K	He’s upset and it’s really not OK	That person can’t spell Short form of OK All is well
OK!	All is well!	The one text that actually means “OK”
MK	He’s upset and it’s really not OK	That person can’t spell Vernacular for OK All is well
Whatever	He’s mad Do whatever you want (which is not what the responder wants)	Great! That person is flexible You can do “whatever” you want That person is open to all options
ight	He’s mad Fine! Do whatever you want (which is not what the responder wants)	That person can’t spell It’s “alright” You can do whatever you want
Cool	All is well OR… He’s upset and it is really not Cool	All is well
Alrighty	All is well!	A cute sign off All is well
Sounds Good	All is well!	All is well!
Really?	He’s mad Are you serious? Really? Whatever!	That person can’t believe what you just texted That person wants to know if what you texted is really true
Later	He is mad OR See you later	Something is going to take place at a later time See you later

For those of you who have not understood Snapchat, it is a one to ten second video stream that your child can respond to or not. Unfortunately, if they opt for the latter, the sender can feel rejected and confused.  

“No man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison…. Out of the same mouth can come praise and cursing. “(James 3: 8, 10)

Put the word “text” into the previous sentence where you see the word “tongue” or “mouth.”  Encourage your children to communicate with friends, family and potential boyfriends/girlfriends in person. Admonish your children to confront their issues in real time, not in a “hashtag” on a tweet or Instagram. Explain to your children that subtleties in tone sent in a text effect the receiver just as much as if you have said it. Trails of sub tweets, Facebook posts and texts leave wounds that can be recalled instantly, over and over again.

It has been a daunting task to convince my daughter to call or visit someone in person when there is a question as to the intent or tone of a text or post instead of tweeting a subtle response for all to see.  My husband has said “any young man that tweets or texts a break-up message is not suitable for my daughter anyway.”  This, by the way (BTW), is a universal “no no.”

My Sydney is a lovely young lady and I am convinced she will be the wiser for taking some of our advice to heart.

I think I’m going to go tweet that! #loveher