While I Am Waiting...by Becky Farmer

While I am waiting…..

“Lord how am I gonna make it?” What am I to do?  These are questions that you might be asking yourself if you are newly “single again”.
 
Regardless of how you got here, you’re here. The last thing you need now is to make huge mistakes out of a desire to feel needed and wanted again. So, what is a girl to do? How can I honor God with my time and talents and still be a good mom? When is it ok to “date” again? REALLY??? 

To answer all these questions is not an easy one unless you have walked with God thru this journey. The most important thing a newly single again mom must remember is that God promises never to leave us or forsake us, especially now. In the midst of all my heartache, I cried out to God to protect my girls and heal my broken heart. Until that happens, the heart healing, you cannot even contemplate dating again. The mere thought made me sick to my stomach that I could even become close to a man again. So, what did I do with all my time? Being a single working mom made that decision pretty easy, I worked and took care of my girls. The rest of the time I spent serving my Lord, thru my church. I taught 8th grade girls Sunday School, led a Financial Peace group and began a Single Parenting class. This not only served God but allowed me time to seek God and His direction for my life, and for the life of my girls.
 
God is so awesome and when He is ready for you to move forward to love again, He will make it very clear. It was like I had blinders removed from my eyes and heart when he had healed me and made me realize that I could be loved and that I was ready to date. I mentioned in my previous blog the “top 10 list” that I developed in counseling.  I was very serious about that list and had decided if a potential date didn’t meet those requirements, then I was fine with being single forever. It is ok to be single, it is not a death sentence. I learned more about myself and my God in those 3 years of being single than I had in all my previous years of life. I also got to see a side of God’s church and my church family that amazed me. I would wake up on Saturday mornings to hear lawn mowers outside mowing my grass! Yes, men from my church who had given of their time to minister to me. What an awesome outpouring of love. I would also receive money from strangers and friends who knew what a struggle being a single mom was and gave to me generously from a loving heart.  

When I began to pray for this man who would meet all of my top 10 requirements, I also prayed very specifically that IF I were to marry again, that God would bring him to me quickly and make it clear, very clear, who this man would be. I did not want to be one of those ladies who dated many men in search of their prince charming. I have two young girl children at home  that would not be sending them a good message. So, my prayers were very specific, VERY specific. And my God, supplied all my needs according to His riches in glory!!! My Michael is a wonderful man, not perfect, but perfect for me and God designed him to my specifications because my prayer was very specific. 

I have seen women separate from their husbands and begin the downward spiral, looking for love and acceptance from any man who will look their way. It is easy to be tempted to go this path, but God’s way is a much better choice. Allow yourself time to mend, take care of yourself and your children, TIME does heal all wounds and crying out to our Heavenly Father for guidance will allow you to make wise, godly decisions while you are in the midst of the storm.  Knowing who you are in Christ and that you are worthy of His best, will allow you to take your time and wait upon the Lord to reveal His perfect plan for your life.
 
Pray, seek and serve! That was my motto during those 3 years before God brought Michael and I together. I hope you choose the same, my God will not let you down.